Miss Pauling (
prpl_assistant) wrote2011-09-12 11:56 am
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Memo 001: Meet the Assistant.
A. Action for 1337 Benny Road.
[The first thing Miss Pauling notes when she opens her eyes is how bright the bedroom is. She shuts her eyes tightly, having not yet readjusted to the light. However, when she opens them up again, she immediately notes something else.
The walls around her weren't coloured purple.
Confused, she reaches for her glasses at the bedside table, only to note that they weren't her usual optic wear either. They were just the wrong shape.]
That's strange, where are my glasses...?
[Her hands fumbled around for her familiar pair of spectacles, until she accidentally knocked over the lamp with a resounding smash.]
Ooops.
B. Phone
Hello? Is there anyone there? I...I think I've been kidnapped!
[The first thing Miss Pauling notes when she opens her eyes is how bright the bedroom is. She shuts her eyes tightly, having not yet readjusted to the light. However, when she opens them up again, she immediately notes something else.
The walls around her weren't coloured purple.
Confused, she reaches for her glasses at the bedside table, only to note that they weren't her usual optic wear either. They were just the wrong shape.]
That's strange, where are my glasses...?
[Her hands fumbled around for her familiar pair of spectacles, until she accidentally knocked over the lamp with a resounding smash.]
Ooops.
B. Phone
Hello? Is there anyone there? I...I think I've been kidnapped!
no subject
no subject
It was bad enough that she wakes up in a bad that does not belong to her (she's not that kind of girl!!). Things get even more complicated when she hears sound coming from the kitchen.]
H-hello? Who's there?
[Secretly though, she grabs one of the ornaments lying around the house and lays in wait around the corner. If this person has kidnapped her, than he is going to pay for making her late for work. The moment he steps out of the kitchen, she's going to bring the piece of house decor right down on his head.]
no subject
No, it couldn't be.
But it didn't seem very likely that either Spy would use that voice as a disguise given what just happened recently (http://mayfield-logs.livejournal.com/161107.html). He stays where he is and calls back:)
Come on in, brekkie will be ready in a tick.
(Good thing he has a knife in hand, just in case.)
no subject
Mr.Mundy? Is that...you?
no subject
If you don't moind, would you come in so we can talk face t' face? You can Spoi-check me if you'd loike.
no subject
[She heads into the kitchen and sure enough, there's the RED Sniper, in the middle of cooking breakfast. She approaches him carefully, until she's right in front of him.]
Mr Mundy, if you are the real him...I'm very sorry about this.
[There goes the golf trophy, aimed right at his head. She's swinging with all her strength too.]
no subject
(His expression and tone still the same polite detachment it was before:) Now that we've got that out 'f th' way, woi don't you sit down for some brekkie? I've only got decaf in th' 'ouse, but if you'd loike I can pour you some.
no subject
You ARE the RED Sniper! Oh my God I am really, really sorry about hurting you, I didn't mean to! Is there a first-aid kit somewhere?
no subject
Sit down, eat. I'll brief you about this place once we're done.
no subject
Umm...so I take it that you didn't kidnap me here?
no subject
(And he starts teal deering about what he knows about Mayfield between bites of breakfast, his brain still not quite having processed the "boss' second-in-command is my not!wife" thing. He's simply decided that he's not going to think about that right now and treat her like he would any other new arrival.)
no subject
Wait. Her fork hovered over the plate as the realisation suddenly sank in. If what the Sniper was saying was true, that she was in a simulation of some sort, and that she was supposed to play the role of the "housewife"...]
Does...does this mean I'm your...wife?
[The last words comes out as practically a squeak. The Administrator was so going to kill her; instead of being friends, she was now somehow married instead! ]
no subject
In name only. Th' master bedroom's all yours. I 'aven't slept there for over a year, and I don't moind taking most 'f th' chores.
We're not th' only ones 'ere, either. For RED, there's also th' Spoi and th' Pyro; for BLU, their Spoi, Pyro, Scout, and Medic.
(He, of course, has yet to find out about the other new arrivals since he isn't omniscient.)
no subject
So, there are more BLUs than REDs than? How has that worked out for all of you?
(She's doing to be careful about this; in such close proximity of all the other mercenaries, there's a real danger she might grow attached to them. Especially the RED Sniper, seeing as they would be living together.)
no subject
It's roight irritating, but it's 'is job, after all.
no subject
(She wonders whether she should comment on the whole "no best-buds" thing between the teams, but for now she decides she'll hold her tongue and wait it out. Besides, it would make it easier for all of them to get out if they weren't busy trying to blow each other up on a daily basis.)
Well, thanks very much for the meal. I'll do the dishes, it's only fair that we share the chores, seeing as we're living in the same house now.
no subject
(He nods at her when she offers to do the dishes.)
Appreciate it.
no subject
So, how long have you been here, Mr Mundy? It sounds like you've been here for quite a while.
no subject
Almost a year and a 'alf.
Th' record 'f being around th' longest goes t' th' BLU Scout, though.
no subject
no subject
no subject
You're not too shabby, Mr Mundy. RED picks only the best out of the best.
Seeing as it's possible that I'll be stuck here for a long time, is there anything I can do in Mayfield?
no subject
That remoinds me, you'll need a gun. This place isn't safe for Civilians.
(He gets up and nods towards the living room.)
Wot sort 'f foirearms are you most familiar with?
no subject
(She finishes the last few dishes and dries then before putting them onto the rack. When the Sniper mentions guns, her eyes light up immediately.)
You wouldn't happen to have a Colt Single Action Army revolver, would you? It's a single action revolver with six cartridges. Something like the RED Spies Ambassador, but it packs a stronger punch.
no subject
You use a 'and cannon loike that? Sure, I've got one. Th' gun cabinet's in th' living room. You want t' come take a look? Maybe something else moight catch your eye.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)